Episode 7: When Things are Changing

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When Things are Changing
Season 1 Episode 7

Summary

In this reflective and deeply personal episode, Françoise shares the real-time evolution of both her inner life and her work. After completing three years of trauma therapy and a nine-month mentorship in the Alchemy of Menopause, she unpacks what it means to grow, change, and release the old stories—especially around perimenopause. This episode is a soft turning point for The Way Home to Yourself, inviting listeners into a more spacious, holistic, and grounded perspective on midlife.

Keywords

midlife transition, perimenopause, menopause, trauma healing, women's empowerment, nervous system, Cathy Skipper, Alchemy of Menopause, holistic self-care, midlife coaching, the divine feminine, beginner’s mind, personal growth

Resources & Links

Takeaways

  • True change in midlife is emotional, spiritual, and deeply personal—not just hormonal.

  • It’s natural to feel lost, confused, or unfamiliar to yourself in your 40s and 50s—this is part of transformation.

  • We must release old identities and pathologizing narratives to step fully into the next chapter.

  • Grounding rituals, nervous system support, and spiritual practices create stability during times of upheaval.

  • Midlife is not a decline; it’s a rich, fertile time of growth, if we allow it to be.

Chapters | Timestamps

00:00 – Opening shift: no intro, straight into change
02:10 – The origin of The Way Apothecary and early perimenopause
07:32 – Creating what didn’t exist: “chill menopause”
11:58 – A year in: new perspective on what midlife really asks of us
15:10 – Saying goodbye to therapy and mentorship
19:01 – Midlife beyond menopause: letting go of labels
22:48 – What’s next for The Way & the podcast
27:40 – Beginner’s mind and befriending the unknown
31:22 – Grounding and rhythm during transition
35:11 – When irritation is information: boundaries in midlife
40:50 – The forest fire metaphor: fertile ground after the burn
45:08 – Meditation: radiating from your center
49:42 – Closing thoughts and gentle next steps

Full Transcript

Good afternoon, ladies—or morning or evening, wherever you are. You'll notice I didn’t begin with the usual intro about the podcast. That’s because things are changing. Which brings me to this week’s episode: When Things Are Changing.

Midlife can feel like one big shift. Our lives, our bodies, our identities—they’re not what they used to be. And I wanted to talk about that today because I’m right in the middle of it myself, both in my personal life and in my work with The Way Apothecary and this podcast, The Way Home to Yourself.

When I first launched both, they were very focused on perimenopause and menopause. And that made sense at the time—I was deep in it. I had just moved to San Francisco. I was overwhelmed, anxious, and searching for something—tools for stress, hormonal support, and some kind of ritual I could hold onto.

No one had really told me about perimenopause, so I was starting from scratch. I began experimenting with formulas and sharing them with friends and clients in my private aromatherapy practice. Those blends eventually became the Women’s Circle oils.

At the same time, I was going through a personal awakening. Through my own healing and my studies with Cathy Skipper—creator of the Alchemy of Menopause program—I began to realize: I no longer wanted to live according to someone else's version of what this life stage should be. The way menopause was portrayed—online, in social media, even among the few brands out there—it felt off. It was either a pity party or overly hyped and anxious. And I just kept thinking, “Where is the calm menopause stuff?” So I created it.

But even then, I wrestled with how it made me feel. Would talking about menopause make me seem less attractive? Would anyone want to hear this? Was the world even ready for a positive, empowered menopause narrative?

Now, a year in, I’m in a completely different place.

Last week, I wrapped up two major chapters in my life: I completed three deeply transformative years of trauma therapy and said goodbye to my mentor and community after a nine-month facilitator training with Cathy Skipper. Both were emotional endings. But they marked something important—something closing, something opening.

And in that spaciousness, I realized something. I no longer want menopause to define my brand. It's part of the story, yes—but it’s not the story. What I’ve learned is that all of this—the stress, the hormonal changes, the questions of identity—it’s not just menopause. It’s midlife. It’s transformation. And I don’t want to keep pathologizing women’s bodies by focusing only on the symptom-based narrative.

The world is already doing that. I don’t want to.

It’s so easy to get caught in it. You wake up, you take your herbs, your vitamins, you’re doing all the things. But it becomes everything. And at some point I thought: it’s time to lighten it up. Yes, support the nervous system. Yes, balance hormones. But also: create beauty. Invite joy. Reconnect with what feels good.

That’s the direction I’m taking The Way Apothecary. The Women’s Circle oils and body wash are just the beginning. I have five new products on the way and more beyond that—but I’m taking my time with them, leaning into their beauty, letting them support not just physiology, but presence. Ritual. Sensory delight.

So yes, we’re still about perimenopause and menopause. But we’re also about the broader journey of midlife, about stress reduction, about creating a vibrant, beautiful life.

Because here’s the truth: no one I know fits that tired stereotype of the midlife woman. I’ve got vibrant friends doing amazing things. I’m doing my thing. And I want to reclaim this time for what it truly is—a sacred threshold, not a decline.

Looking back, I hardly recognize myself at 40. I was into health and meditation, yes—but I didn’t really know myself. I was reactive, traumatized, and just beginning to awaken. These past 10 years have changed me. And that’s the gift of midlife.

So if you’re going through change—if you’re in your 40s or 50s and feeling like everything is unfamiliar—don’t resist it. Don’t panic. Be curious.

There’s a beautiful concept in Zen called beginner’s mind—approaching life with fresh eyes, without assumptions. Just observing. That’s how we meet the new self that’s emerging. She might ask you to look at old dreams, unhealed wounds, or relationships that no longer fit. She knows what you need.

This is metamorphosis. Like the butterfly turning to mush inside the chrysalis, we are in the goo. But we’re not going backward—we’re evolving.

And yes, it can be chaotic and uncomfortable. That’s why grounding is so important. Whatever that looks like for you—deep breathing, chanting, walking in nature, bathing before bed—find your touchstones. Let them anchor you during change.

Feel your feet on the earth. Imagine roots growing down. Even if you’re in a city, find a way to connect. Go outside. Take your shoes off. Stand on grass. And if you can’t? Go to the produce aisle. There’s life energy there, too.

Journaling helps. Community helps. Therapy can help, especially someone who understands the feminine path of midlife. A Jungian analyst. A coach who truly gets it. Someone who knows that this isn't about becoming smaller and more patient. It’s about becoming more you.

Sometimes we get short with people. We lose patience. And often, that’s not a flaw—it’s information. It’s telling you where boundaries need to be. Ask yourself: is this frustration deserved? Because often, the people who are triggering us have been a problem for a long time. You’re just now waking up to that.

This isn’t about aggression—it’s about self-respect. About not blaming yourself for your awakening. In our earlier years, we needed to play those calm, patient roles. Now? Not anymore.

My mid to late 40s felt like a forest fire. I let go of so many things—friendships, family dynamics, old beliefs. And I was left standing in the ash, looking around at all that had burned.

But here’s the magic: after fire, the soil becomes fertile. And now, I feel that fertility in my life. That possibility.

So if you’re in that burning phase, know this: it won’t last forever. If you do the work, it clears. The women who stay stuck are the ones who avoid it. What you resist persists. But when you face it, it moves. You heal.

[Guided Meditation]

If you're driving, pause here and come back later. But if you're able, get comfortable.

Close your eyes. Feel your body rooting down into the earth—feet or tailbone connecting to the floor. Inhale through your nose, exhale through your mouth.

Now, go to your heart center. Imagine a small ball of light there—your soul’s essence. It’s always with you. Watch it grow. Let it expand until the light surrounds your entire body. Sit in that glow.

Place your left hand on your heart, right hand over it. Take a deep breath.

And when you’re ready, open your eyes.

I’ll see you back here in a couple of weeks. The format may shift—I'm working toward adding video—but for now, I just want to keep this space open and flowing.

Come visit me at thewayapothecary.com, or send me a message if there’s a topic you’d love to hear about. I’d truly love to hear from you.

Wishing you all the love in the world.
Take good care.