One of the things many women experience as they enter perimenopause is a feeling of losing their femininity. Suddenly, one might feel klutzy, awkward, and just, well… different. I personally felt like these symptoms were worse than the usual “I feel gross” that sometimes came with PMS.

This is temporary and can be worked through. In fact, the experience can lead us to lean into our femininity in new ways and own it once and for all.

The first step in reconnecting with yourself is to have self-compassion and understand that there is some science behind this. The feelings of being klutzy and awkward are probably due to the fluctuation of the hormones estrogen, progesterone, and testosterone. So, breathe a sigh of relief. It’s not permanent.

I have always prided myself on my posture and gait. One day I was in my kitchen, and caught myself slamming a cabinet. Then I noticed I was walking heavily - stomping is probably a better word. None of this felt right to me and I knew I needed to make some changes. Following are some of the things that got me through this awkward phase of perimenopause.

Begin each day with an affirmation: This has been so helpful to me that I continue with it to this day. Make up one that resonates with you and affirms your beauty and femininity. The one I use is “I am beautiful, graceful, timeless and radiant at any age.” Use this or create your own and say it to yourself every morning as soon as you wake up. You can repeat it throughout the day as needed. Take time to feel it and let it resonate in every inch of your body.

Practice body awareness: Stay in your body. Go through your day slowly. Take time to move gracefully. Rather than slam things and run around, be present. This is the time to create the grace you seek. Also, check in with your posture throughout the day. Stand tall and graceful like a swan.

Call in scent: Aromatherapy or scent in general is a wonderful way to call in our femininity. To do this, I gravitate to essential oils such as rose, jasmine, neroli and ylang ylang. You can even use a perfume that makes you feel beautiful. There are some beautiful natural scents on the market today. Find one that resonates with you.

Adorn yourself with things of beauty: Sometimes you just want to be comfy, but when you are feeling off in the ways we are discussing, don't underestimate the power of putting yourself together, maybe doing your makeup etc. Sometimes it feels better. If this helps you, go for it!

Practice an exercise method that makes you feel graceful: Gracefulness can be learned and practiced. Try an adult ballet class or Pilates. I personally love Ballet Beautiful. It’s an elegant yet challenging workout that sculpts ballet muscles. I’ve been doing this method for over ten years and have no intention of stopping. Or, try Pilates, which focuses on posture and controlled movement.

I hope this helps you on your journey. If you have any comments or questions, please share them with our community below.

Lots of love,
Françoise